As we told you on our exclusive backstage look at “The Sex Bus” last month, “The sign says Kulonjarat but the real destination is about nine inches up Black Angelika’s ass.”

We are not really aware of a destination in this Vaginal Mystery Tour, as getting there is the thing that’s important.

Director: JF Romagnoli
Starring: Amy Cameron, Gilda Roberts, Jasmine Black, Simony Diamond, Linda Brown, Black Angelika, Jasmine Rouge, Louise Black

Scene 1: B/G/G/G

Our journey begins with a tasteful bang as the lucky groom of Black Angelika shares his new bride with her two bridesmaids and the bus driver careens through the streets of Budapest drinking champagne.

I’m not saying that Sex Bus drivers are menaces on the road; I’m just saying that, unless it is you fucking Black Angelika, there is no reason to be on the road.

Scene 2: B/G

The ancient scrolls describe Scene 2, featuring the delicious Linda Brown, thusly:

Down in at the mechanics Linda Brown needs her oil changing, she needs some lubrication to get her engine running, that the mechanic can get his gear stick into her gaping asshole!

You might say, “But where’s the bus?” and I would reply, “You do not have your priorities in order.”

Scene 3: B/B/G

Simony Diamond comforts two weary travelers who have missed the Sex Bus. How does she comfort them? By stripping to her high heels and blowing them through the bars of a cage.

I missed at least three buses on my recent trip to Hungary, but not once was I given a blowjob for it. Maybe it’s because I don’t speak Magyar.

Scene 4: B/G

Jasmine Black is in a loving and committed relationship with the bus driver. Despite this, she is jealous of the goings-on on his bus. To show her disapproval, she wears his hat and fucks him.

Perhaps you are thinking, “If everyone resolved conflicts like Jasmine Black, there would be word peace.”

That’s right, my friend. But since there’s not enough of Jasmine Black to go around, I’d like to give her a peace prize personally.

Scene 5: B/G

Oh, Gilda Roberts. With your tiny breasts and ladylike white stockings, you are too refined for a Sex Bus. That is why you deliver tasteful pantsless lapdances at clubs.

Scene 6: B/G

My favorite scene features Amy Cameron. Many of us have imagined fucking a stranger on a bus, train, airplane, zeppelin, or hydrofoil, but the sinful Ms. Cameron is up for the job.

Don’t get me wrong – she’s not easy; she waits a full minute as her anonymous partner rubs his dick over her tits before she finally starts blowing him. That is because she is a Lady. Leave the quickies for the ice cream truck, I always say.

Watch “The Sex Bus” here